After The Ecstasy The Laundry
Usually, the first seasonal card anyone receives is from me. I would have sent my family their first round of gifts back in Pittsburgh. (Yes, I am from beautiful, fabulous, glamorous, romantic Pittsburgh, PA) I normally would be elbow-deep in flour, baking holiday cookies and sweet bread like the stuff was goin’-outta-style already.
This year is different.
It is unlike any I have experienced. I’m not gilding the Xmas Lily with my usual glee. There is a change coming. I feel it in my very bones. For the first time in my life, this crazy season I love, is not doin’ it for me like it should. Zen tradition has an expression you have probably heard.
“After the ecstasy, the laundry.”
These days I feel as though I have it backward. Laundry first!
The times we find ourselves in are globally punishing. There is a palpable sense of lack. A mild to raging feeling of depression coursing through the being of just about everyone I speak with lately. As I counsel the dazed and confused I find that I am working my detachment skills to death.
This depressing malady is highly contagious and currently possesses more viruses than a $10 hooker!
I am doing my very best to keep the energy high, anxiety low, and bolster my resistance.
I would say I was doing a good job but for this restless feeling I have beneath it all. It feels whack to be restless and slow at the same time. Kind of like a 70’s goof-ball high. (Not that I would know about that sort of thing, personally, but I was a musician back then… )
This change-is-gonna-come, stop-fooling-around, time-to-bust-a-move feeling is over powering. I’m not used to this brand of impatience at this time of year. It is an early Spring feeling in a late Fall time frame.
Will I be able to enjoy my holiday’s? Sure I will.
I put up the little pink Barbie tree and decorated it with a hundred angels. I steamed, pressed, and put out the white lace tablecloths and put away the every day checked ones. There are golden votive candles ablaze and mulling spices simmering on the stove. My dear friend Lady Di sent a lovely, fresh, Victorian wreath to me today. So now I may deck my halls with style and have a tree planted in my name to boot.
Most of us are waking up to the fact that we have to make some changes in the way we live our lives. If we don’t it will be many moons before we will be feeling “the ecstasy” again. Mostly we will be drowning in dirty laundry praying for the good housekeeping faery to come by and “redd up” the mess. ( I told you I was from Pittsburgh.)
Will I be happy when the holiday’s are over this year?
Yes, for the first time in my life the answer is yes.
I’m not quite up for the distraction.
I want to stay focused so I will be in-step with what I feel is on the wind. I don’t want to “catch” the general malaise growing stronger daily in this country. I want to be in motion even if it is slow motion.
I am pretty sure a moving target is harder to hit.
Have a sweet one!